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Funny Fairy Tales by Ambrose Bierce

The Unchanged Diplomatist

THE republic of Madagonia had been long and well represented at the
court of the King of Patagascar by an officer called a Dazie, but
one day the Madagonian Parliament conferred upon him the superior
rank of Dandee. The next day after being apprised of his new
dignity he hastened to inform the King of Patagascar.

'Ah, yes, I understand,' said the King; 'you have been promoted and
given increased pay and allowances. There was an appropriation?'

'Yes, your Majesty.'

'And you have now two heads, have you not?'

'Oh, no, your Majesty - only one, I assure you.'

'Indeed? And how many legs and arms?'

'Two of each, Sire - only two of each.'

'And only one body?'

'Just a single body, as you perceive.'

Thoughtfully removing his crown and scratching the royal head, the
monarch was silent a moment, and then he said:

'I fancy that appropriation has been misapplied. You seem to be
about the same kind of idiot that you were before.'


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